not suffering!

James 1:27 Pure religion is to look after orphans and widows in their distress


Here I am once again, pondering, always pondering. I think too much. All week I am thinking about what I am to say to all of you. First of all I still remain humbled and amazed by the generosity of my friends and family. Thank you all for your prayers and donations. I am so blessed. I am very content here, despite the conditions. It is a simple life and I don’t miss Atlanta traffic and the things that life in the States contains.
I wake up each morning at 5 to watch the sunrise. Breakfast is served around 7 and consists of the sweetest tea you ever tasted. Yes, sweeter than our tea in the south. We also get a large homemade roll. Right now I am having this out on our back porch watching others scurry to the kitchen. I am enjoying our little community of students, all ages, all backgrounds, various countries. There is a fullness within interpersonal relationships and this communal living. Our society stresses independence and self-reliance and I am a prime example. What a relief to live a life where we can depend on each other and no longer feel that we have to live in isolation.
I am daily humbled by the lifestyle of the people here and the joy on their faces. The people of Mozambique are very polite and friendly. We have not had running water and have had to haul water from a well, wash clothes by hand and burn our own trash. I cannot imagine having to prepare my own food or care for children in this environment and am honestly just really grateful I don’t have to. The kids are amazing. There is no racism in their hearts, animosity, resentment or hatred. They just love to be held and in turn you get your socks blessed off by their affection. In Genesis 1 God creates humankind in His own image and puts everything in place to sustain humankind. When we are complete in Him, it changes the way we see others. The poor, the unworthy, the sinner and me. We are all created in the image of God. We are all capable of corresponding with God. To me, this responsibility as an image bearer can no longer be evaded. Because of this we have a responsibility to clothe and feed the poor and the hungry and it is no longer an option to not interfere. The selfish life of just grappling to get all you can and horde it for yourself is very unfulfilling and it is truly more blessed to give than to receive. All this seems to be slowly falling into place for me as I am making the choice to live for something greater than myself. Faith comes from hearing, not from having heard, thank the Lord. So I am daily just trying to hear. To many of you this may seem such a simple concept and you have already mastered it. I just seem to do things the hard way and have to so something drastic like go to Mozambique to find the meaning of life.
I am in class from 8-3ish with a break for rice and beans in between. Classes have been great. I really thirst for more education and knowledge. I know that two months of this is going to be great for me and I will do my best to share what I am learning. After class we have free time, but this seems to always be consumed with some activity or another. I am trying to run here, but it is difficult. I have to run with someone and running outside the base can be dangerous. Most people head to the beach and that is my plan this afternoon. I still have not found the reef.
One of my main questions I want answered is “Can a nation change”?. I know you must be thinking that surely I had already answered that one, but no, I question everything and have to see it for myself. So this is the journey that I am on and the question I ponder every day. We are called as His disciples and to be His hands and feet. And that is why I am here. God will certainly have to do the work, I am just a vessel. I step out in faith, believing that God can change the hearts of the people and that they will see His love and realize that He is the one, true living God and no other god can satisfy. It seems insane that I am here to share in this message when I am daily learning it myself. My trust and faith is still growing. “Unless He in you makes the suffering your own you can’t intercede for them; you will never touch the throne unless you send up that real cry; words don’t count at all“ - Rees Howells
I am doing my best to intercede, lay down my life so that I can finally live, and searching for the well of everlasting joy. I am grateful for your prayers and your interest in me and my journey.
I will blog as often as I can, but may be Wednesday’s only. I will check e-mail then and write you back if I can. We are limited on time and the internet is dial-up and terribly slow. Love, love, love..