gates of splendor

I've been reading from Jim Elliot's journals this morning.  His name keeps popping up this week. And he is too obscure to ignore. He was quoted in a paperback I thumbed through just the other day. I recently watched a rather dull documentary about missionaries in Papua New Guinea and could only think about him in Ecuador. Lush greenery, brown naked bodies, and a bush pilot in khaki pants. 

“I pray for you, that all your misgivings will be melted to thanksgivings. Remember that the shadow a thing casts often far exceeds the size of the thing itself (especially if the light be low on the horizon) and though some future fear may strut brave darkness as you approach, the thing itself will be but a speck when seen from beyond. Oh that He would restore us often with that 'aspect from beyond,' to see a thing as He sees it, to remember that He dealeth with us as with sons.”
― Jim Elliot

This is profound and such deep truth.  I saw the film about their life, End of the Spear, years ago. I went with some goober I was dating at the time. The opening scenes made me cry, vibrant green landscape, tribal people. Such majestic beauty. Jim Elliot and Nate Saint were killed by the tribe to which they went to minister. His level of knowing Jesus and his confidence in Him is acute and almost tangible. I am mesmerized by it. There is a scene where one of the missionaries sons asks him to take a gun with him as they visit the tribe for the first time, but the man sets it aside and tells the boy that he could not take someones life who didn't know Christ. He couldn't end someones life to save his own, knowing it would send them into hell. Such strong conviction. It was a scene that took my breath away. It was a nugget of deep truth that I took with me when I lived among the Makua- that I was sent to love, no matter what. The scene made me weep and Goober scoff. I didn't understand such sacrifice. I am beginning to. My theology is not really the same but my passion for loving and sacrifice and confidence in my inheritance should be. I am a daughter and I want to see things as He sees it and I will always need my “misgivings melted to thanksgivings.”  

“God always gives his best to those who leave the choice with him” 

― Jim Elliot